With the advent of social media, came a new communication reckoning. A more fluid path to share ideas, opinions, experiences & observations. We wrote, we read, we liked, we shared & we commented. We opened ourselves to being influenced in ways we had never imagined.
Yet, one area still seems largely impervious to change; remaining petrified and impervious.
We do not recognize that influencing how we view ourselves is vital.
We seem to crowdsource that opinion from every point, every voice in the social media universe.
But fail to acknowledge that we are indeed the experts.
Ultimately, we fail to influence ourselves (about ourselves).
It’s an old mistake; but one wholly amplified by the new zeitgeist. Over time, we have become so accustomed (possibly committed) to being noticed by others, recognized by others, made relevant by others — that we fail to shift our own perspectives of us. This can limit our potential in so many aspects of our lives & our work. Everything seems to land at our doorsteps; all of the bits if knowledge & advice. Yet we don’t seem to budge. Even as we are actually the experts of us.
I’ve often thought that therapy is one of the only methods to address this. There is something vital about someone skilled to navigate our moments and misconceptions alongside us. Yet, even with that exercise, we are often left standing at the proverbial bus stop waiting for a change in opinion that never fully manifests.
We struggle (famously so) to actually apply what has been brought to our attention.
It seems that changing our self-perception is almost a microscopically slow process of growth & evolution. It behaves in a similar manner to concepts such as confidence or falling in love. You shift slowly, until one day the entire universe of awareness suddenly washes over you. Yet, until that very moment that shift is silent (yet, all the while dividing, growing).
The way we finally stumble on that shift is somewhat of a mystery. We are often mired in a dated assessment of ourselves, long after that summary is invalid. Yet, I cannot think of a better investment of focus.
What holds us back may be a lack of commitment to ourselves. A lack of vision. Or perhaps a lack of hope.
But, I dare you.
Influence yourself.
Note: I’ve found this article — that might help us begin.
Dr. Marla Gottschalk is an Industrial/Organizational Psychologist who focuses on bringing core stability to our work lives. She is a charter member of the LinkedIn Top Voice Program. Her thoughts on work & life have appeared in various outlets including the Harvard Business Review, The Muse, Brit & Co, Talent Zoo, Forbes, Quartz and The Huffington Post
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